July 24, 2014 · 10:21 am

It’s Probably Their Own Fault – and other marks of our idolatry

You probably know someone who is hurting.  Perhaps they put on a happy face.  Perhaps they keep things close to the chest.

Perhaps their happy family life is not what it appears to be.  Perhaps they struggle with an incurable illness year after year and have just learned to quit talking about it.

Why do so many suffer in silence?

I have frequently asked that question.

I started asking again recently.  I have been reading Predators by Anna Salter. After her chapter on Rose Colored Glasses, I put it aside and thought about it.  I think I may know why so many suffer in silence.

Dr. Salter makes the case that in her experience, people tend to view the world as a far better place than the one that actually exists.  They try to make sense of senseless violence, because their minds cannot accept a world where evil can happen to anyone, anywhere.  So they create a new reality in their heads.  In this reality, they are in control of their destiny.  People are generally good.  They can spot liars and deceivers.  They can protect themselves if they just do everything right.

She writes, “People have always wanted to feel safe in the world and to fend off the frightening reality that the death rate is one per person and that the timing of it appears to have nothing to do with goodness.”

The reality of this world is that there is death, sickness, suffering, illness and senseless acts of violence.  But this clashes with our own idolatry – that if we do everything exactly right, we can avoid anything unpleasant.  Were we not told that we control our own destiny?

But dreams do not bring with them the talent to achieve them.

Life does not guarantee health and beauty.

The death rate is still one per person.

 

I think that this explains why we as a fallen human race tend to blame the victim whenever anything bad happens.  It is the only way that we can keep convincing ourselves that we live in a safe and happy and just world with no need of either a Savior or a Judge.

A neighbor is raped.  We immediately find fault in where she was at the time.  What she was wearing.  What she was doing.  What time it was.

A man is chronically ill.  We immediately critique his diet, his habits, his health “pro-activity”.

A child rebels hard against his parents.  We immediately wonder what his parents did to mess him up so bad.  They probably didn’t spank him.  They probably spanked him.

A child dies unexpectedly.  We immediately wonder what the parents did wrong.

A woman is beaten by her husband, and we wonder if she could have been a little more submissive.

 

It is true that a prudent man will take reasonable precautions.  A man would be wise to avoid walking into a bar with a suit made of money.  We should not willfully run into danger.

But this is not what I am talking about.  I am talking about living in a cursed world.  There is wickedness, sickness, death, destruction, misery and all sorts of things that happen to all sorts of people and there is nothing that they could have done to have avoided it.

 

It appears as if we have only two options:  We can either continue to live in the reality that we have constructed in our own minds – that all reality is ultimately determined by our own free will – in which case we will make better choices, despise those who are suffering for making the wrong choices, and close our eyes firmly shut against any evil, whether moral or natural.  Or, we can become cynical, hardened and fatalistic.  Bad things will always happen to me and there is nothing that I can do about it.  Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die.

 

But the Bible commands us to open our eyes to a reality that cannot be seen with the eyes of the flesh.

All things are in the providential hand of God.  Heidelberg Catechism states it plainly:

What do you believe when you say, “I believe in God the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth”?

That the eternal Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who of nothing made heaven and earth with all that is in them, who likewise upholds, and governs them by His eternal counsel and providence, is for the sake of Christ, His Son, my God and my Father, in whom I so trust as to have no doubt that He will provide me with all things necessary for body and soul; and further, that whatever evil He sends upon me in this valley of tears, He will turn to my good; for He is able to do it, being Almighty God, and willing also, being a faithful Father. (Heidelberg Catechism, Q & A 26)

 

Since our Creator created all things of nothing, then He is not like his creatures. A distinction must be made.  That which would make no sense when applied to any creature makes perfect sense when applied to God, for He is almighty, everywhere present, and the Creator and Sustainer of all.

He upholds the world and governs all things by His eternal counsel and providence.  This not only includes the good things, but it also includes calamity.  Nothing is outside of His decree.

The world then is neither governed by man’s free will, leaving us in chaos; nor is it governed by empty fate and determinism, for God is our Heavenly Father, who loves us and gave His only-begotten Son, that whosoever believes on Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

It is true that the misery is in the world because of God’s judgment on the world.

But it is also true that God Himself entered into that misery in the person of Jesus Christ in order to save us from our sins and misery.

And He governs the world not by making us inhuman, but by awakening our full humanity, conforming it to the image of Christ.  He sweetly and irresistibly draws the will by His Holy Spirit, causing us to walk in newness of life.

If this is true, then the only proper response of a Christian towards suffering is mercy.

Perhaps this illness isn’t because there is sin in one’s life.

Perhaps this abuse isn’t because the wife just won’t submit.

Perhaps this couple were good and loving parents and their son was just rebellious.

Perhaps there is calamity in this world that we simply cannot prevent or cure.

And perhaps – just perhaps – the reason why the soccer coach abused the 8 year old girl actually had NOTHING TO DO with the 8 year old seducing him.  The fact that we have to say that sickens me.  Perhaps the reason that very nice soccer coach abused that girl was because he was an evil child of the devil, fit only for the flames of hell.

In other words, sin and misery and sickness and crime are not always things that we could have prevented if we worked harder, made better choices and tried more diligently.

In fact, if we could fix the world – if the doctors were as good as people think that they are, if child protective services could solve family problems, if the probation department could cure crime, if we could prevent all calamity, crime, illness, rebellion, poverty and hatred, then we wouldn’t need a savior at all.

But the facts are different.

Certainly avail yourself of every avenue that God has graciously provided to mitigate suffering.  God is merciful as well as just, and He does work through men and women to alleviate some of the misery in this world.  But justice and mercy in this world always leave us hungering for more, lifting our eyes to heaven when every tear will be dried, where justice will flow like water, and there will be no more curse.

For even though God has provided many good things, we still aren’t in heaven.  Suffering is still the lot of men and women throughout the world, and no amount of human effort will ever eradicate it.

People who are united to Christ by faith still get sick; are still abused and ridiculed; still die; still suffer the heartache of loss and reproach and still weep over injustice, cruelty and hatred.

A merciful man doesn’t give them a list of everything that they need to work on in order to protect and heal themselves.  Perhaps this isn’t even the issue.  Besides, the thinking that all men have the power to overcome all misery is humanism, not Christianity.

A merciful man weeps with those that weep.  He points the sufferer to Christ, who also suffered on this earth.  A merciful man reminds the sufferer that Christ’s suffering also seemed pointless and vain in the eyes of the world, but through those sufferings God defeated all the power of sin and the devil.  God has plans that we cannot fathom, since we are creatures and He is the Creator.  But He HAS promised that every calamity that he brings upon us He will turn to our good.  Whatever evils we have on this earth are not even worthy to be compared to the joy that is set before us.  A merciful man brings the comfort and the power of Jesus Christ, our Lord and King, the just judge over all the earth.

 

And a merciful man always does what he can to ease suffering wherever he is called and with whatever he possesses.  He is called to imitate God, who is merciful and kind, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy (Psalm 103).

A merciful man feeds the hungry instead of telling them to work harder.

He comforts and visits the sick, rather than lecture them on their lack of faith or how to change their diet.  Those who are sick have explored every possibility, believe me.

A merciful man throws out the scoffer, runs off the wolves, opens his home to the homeless sheep.

A merciful man will rescue the sheep from the mouth of the lion, even if the lion is married to the sheep.  He doesn’t tell the sheep to not thrash about so much while the lion is eating.

And most of all, the merciful man gives himself to prayer, intercedes for the outcast, the hungry, the sick and the suffering.  He actually labors in prayer, which is far different than saying, “Praying” in a note but not bothering to do it.  The effective fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much, James tells us.

If we suffer as Christ suffered, we may not be able to explain why.  We may not be able to solve it; we may not be able to save the world, or even ourselves – but where there is misery, there is also abundant grace.

Question 26 of the catechism doesn’t teach purposeless and fatalistic calamity.  It also doesn’t explain why calamity happens to God’s people.  It merely repeats the promise of the Bible.

Whatever evil He sends upon me in this valley of tears, He will turn to my good; for He is able to do it, being Almighty God, and willing also, being a faithful Father.

 

For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning (Psa 30:5).


God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved; God shall help her, just at the break of dawn (Psa 46:5).

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July 17, 2014 · 3:19 am

Go to Church

Over the past few months I have received heartbreaking emails from so many people.  There are those who have been abused at home and then abused again at their church.  Oftentimes churches are so concerned with budgets, power, control and numbers that they forget their commission.  Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.”

And the wounded from these groups are outcast, driven away and the fold is taken over by the wolves.  They ask me, “What do I do?”

My heart weeps for them.  But the answer is always the same.  “Go to church”.

Let me put it this way.  If you could ask God anything at all, what would you ask Him?  Would you expect an answer?  There is a place where God has promised to meet with His people and has promised to hear their prayers and give an answer.  The problem is not God; the problem is that we don’t hear.  God speaks to us through the preaching of His Word.  And this happens at church.  Go to church.  There is a great banquet set for you each Sunday in Church and you are starving.  So go to church, and feast on the word of God.

Are you wounded?  Go to church.  Are you downhearted?  Go to church.  Are you fearful? Go to church.  Pour out your heart to the Lord.  Listen to His voice in the reading of the scripture and the preaching of the word.

I will readily agree with you, however, that not every group that calls itself a church is actually a church.  The vast majority are more concerned with numbers than with sheep; with programs, rather than obedience; with budgets rather than faithfulness.  Perhaps you have been attacked and wounded by one of these groups.

The church in the days of the Reformation struggled with the same issues and questions.  They also were outcast, excommunicated and considered evildoers, even criminals, by the vast majority of “churches”.  But then they realized something.  Not every group that calls itself a church is actually a church.  The Apostle John spoke of churches who had their candlestick removed.  It does happen.  Those churches that used to be full of life and now full of decay and ruin, and the voice of God is never heard.

Many groups today have a lot of activity, a lot of people, a lot of money and a great reputation.  But, to paraphrase Witsius, activity doesn’t mean life.  There is a lot of movement in a dead body.  Maggots and escaping gas from decomposition cause a lot of activity.  I would suggest to you that much of the activity that we see today is the decomposition and active decay of a dead body, that doesn’t know enough to give itself a decent burial.

If God requires us to go to church (see Hebrews 10:25) would He leave His people to guess where that church is to be found?  Would He have us join ourselves with a rotting corpse and promise to meet with us there?  We, who once were dead, have been made alive by the gospel.  Now we are to join with the living Church of God.  God expects that the living join themselves with the living. God Himself has told us how to distinguish a true church from a false one.  The Reformers saw this, and wrote in the Belgic Confession:

The marks by which the true Church is known are these: If the pure doctrine of the gospel is preached therein; if it maintains the pure administration of the sacraments as instituted by Christ; if church discipline is exercised in chastening of sin; in short, if all things are managed according to the pure Word of God, all things contrary thereto rejected, and Jesus Christ acknowledged as the only Head of the Church. Hereby the true Church may certainly be known, from which no man has a right to separate himself (From Article 29).

 

And there it is.  A true church is not one with the youth group, the great band, the charismatic and relevant young and tall preacher; a true church is not the one with the fantastic programs, the large and comfortable building, the most current marketing.  A true church is not the one that does great concerts and revival programs.

The true church is where the Word of God is preached and everything contrary is rejected.  The sacraments are administered according to the Word of God.  The true church cares about the difference between wolves and sheep and are careful in their discipline.  They understand about protecting as well as feeding the sheep.

To often, we look for the wrong thing when we look for a church.  We always get what we are fishing for.  When we are fishing for a church that affirms our own opinion of ourselves, we get a church that also affirms the opinions of wicked and evil men.  When we fish for a church that seeks to cater to the spirit of the age, we get a church that caters to the spirit of the age and the prince of the power of the air.  That isn’t good, in case you were wondering.

But God’s voice is not heard in much activity.  Just like in Elijah’s day, the almighty, everywhere power of God is heard in the still, small voice.  A faithful pastor, in a small church with a few sheep – but full of the power of God.  Maybe the sound equipment is a bit faulty at times.  Maybe he doesn’t do a blog very well.  Maybe he isn’t the handsome media star who can captivate an audience by the power of his deep voice.

These aren’t the marks of a true pastor, and are not the marks of the true church.  Does he know what God’s word is?  Does he submit to the doctrine and authority of the One Holy Apostolic Church?  (In other words, what creed does he hold to and love?  Or does he change with the wind of opinion).

Don’t tell me that there aren’t any churches anymore.  Even in the days of Elijah, God reserved 7000 who had not bowed the knee to Baal.  It is more likely that we are not looking in the right place.  Do you need to change what you have considered important and bring it in line with God’s word?

Sometimes, you might have to move.  This sounds drastic in an age where we look at schools, work, location, weather, shopping and neighborhoods to make our decisions and figure that we can find a church after we get there.  But what if there are none?

Haggai rebuked the people of Israel for seeking the things of the world first and when that was sorted out, then they would take care of God’s worship (Haggai 1).  But they had it backwards.  Worship comes first.  Everything else flows from there.

Go to church.  Put everything else aside.  Find where God’s sheep are meeting and join with them.  Sit quietly.  Learn about God, about yourself, about mankind, about Christ.

Learn about the forgiveness of sins, the sanctification of the Holy Spirit.  Learn about the imputed righteousness of Christ.  Learn about patience, about resting as a weaned child on the lap of the mother. Feast on the body and blood of Christ in the Holy Sacraments.  Stop going to the dead and decaying body, more interested in sound and fury, and learn to hear the still, small voice of God in the faithful preaching of the word, by weak, humble and godly men who know the difference between good and evil.

Go to church.  Do whatever it takes.  Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be added unto you.

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July 11, 2014 · 9:14 pm

Grace and Cruelty, continued

This Sunday (July 13, 2014) I am intending to preach on Colossians 2:6-10.
My mind is whirling. There is a much debated blog intended to be a guide for women married to ungodly (or very ungodly) men. I have previously written concerning just one issue, although there are many others.

Some of those who have commented on the blog have challenged the opposition (of which I am one) to provide a Biblical answer instead of emotional appeals. My previous blog was based upon 1 Corinthians 7 and Romans 13, as well as other passages.

But my mind still whirls. You see, I am not a “proof-texter.” Instead, I believe that the whole of Scripture is the work of One Author, and has one message, from beginning to end. The message of the Bible is nothing else than the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

The modern church chops the Bible up into unrelated verses and sentences, and will frequently come to some rather strange conclusions. One of these strange conclusions that captivates the hearts of American Christians I will call neo-Marcionism.

Marcion was a second century heretic. I know that “heresy” is an unused term, but it is a good one. Marcion taught that the Jehovah God of the Old Testament was evil, truly the devil. And Jesus Christ was the true God who appeared to Adam and Eve in the form of the serpent and then came again to rescue men and women from the tyranny of the Old Testament God.

The recent movie, Noah, as I understand it, was based upon the teachings of Marcion. But that is neither here nor there.

Neo-marcionism posits a complete disconnect between the god of the Old Testament and Jesus of the New Testament. It rears its head every time you hear someone say, “Oh. That’s Old Testament. It isn’t relevant to us today.”

This, like all Marcionism, leads to the bondage of the devil and an outright denial of the heart of the Gospel.

One thing that is very clear throughout the Old Testament is this: God never, ever, treats anyone more or less than they deserve. His justice cannot be denied, and all of his works are equity and truth. Note well the following passages:

For he cometh to judge the earth: with righteousness shall he judge the world, and the people with equity (Psalm 98:9).

“Yet the house of Israel says,`The way of the Lord is not fair.’ O house of Israel, is it not My ways which are fair, and your ways which are not fair?’” (Ezekiel 18:29)

God cannot change. He cannot deny his justice or his equity. This means that he will always treat men and women exactly as they deserve.

This is not good news for man, for man is sinful, and God will never acquit the guilty (Nahum 1:3).

But God is also merciful. He loves to show lovingkindness and tender mercy to the children of men.

The great question of the Bible is this: How can God save man without denying justice and equity? How can God save us when he says “The soul that sins shall die” and we are all sinners?

To understand the Gospel, you must also understand the hopeless situation that man was in. God is a righteous judge who will never, ever, treat men and women unfairly, for He cannot. And the law declares that we are all guilty before a just and holy God.

But then angels appeared and announced the birth of a Child. “Thou shalt call His name Jesus, for He shall save His people from their sins.”

If God cannot ever bless an unrighteous man, there is only one way for us to be blessed by God. We have to be righteous. So the most important question anyone can ask themselves is this: “How can I be righteous before God?”

The answer of the Bible is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. You have to have a righteousness that is not your own.

This has been confessed repeatedly by the faithful, and is included in every confession of faith written by the orthodox. My favorite expression of this great truth is in the Heidelberg Catechism:

60. How are you righteous before God?
Only by true faith in Jesus Christ: that is, although my conscience accuses me, that I have grievously sinned against all the commandments of God, and have never kept any of them, and am still prone always to all evil; yet God, without any merit of mine, of mere grace, grants and imputes to me the perfect satisfaction, righteousness, and holiness of Christ, as if I had never committed nor had any sins, and had myself accomplished all the obedience which Christ has fulfilled for me; if only I accept such benefit with a believing heart.

61. Why do you say that you are righteous by faith only?
Not that I am acceptable to God on account of the worthiness of my faith, but because only the satisfaction, righteousness, and holiness of Christ is my righteousness before God; and I can receive the same and make it my own in no other way than by faith only.

This is the only way that God can be reconciled to man. Man must become righteous and must pay the penalty for his sin. But we cannot do it, for we daily increase our guilt. So God became flesh in the womb of Mary and fulfilled the law in our place, and took the penalty of the wrath of God in our place.

By faith, we are in Christ. His obedience was our obedience; His righteousness is our righteousness; His death was our death; His life is our life.

This is the heart of the gospel.

But the neo-marcion has subtly changed this. The prevailing view is not that God’s justice was completely satisfied; but that God decided to be nicer and not so cruel. God, they say, was tired of all of that justice stuff and started to forgive instead.

But what they forget is that God cannot ever change, nor can he ever be unjust. The only reason that we have hope of eternal life, the only reason that we have peace with God, is that God now considers us to be righteous, because the righteousness of Jesus Christ was imputed to us and our sins were imputed to Him.

Because of this John can write, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (I john 1:9)

How can it possibly be just, fair or equal for God to forgive sin? Only by a clear understanding of the Gospel can we see it. When we are clothed with Christ’s righteousness by faith and our sins are cleansed by the blood of Christ, then it would be the highest injustice for God to punish us in hell, for punishment has already taken place on the cross.

A righteous man suffering in hell is a tremendous injustice, and God is not unjust. In Christ, it is “as if I had never committed nor had any sins, and had myself accomplished all the obedience which Christ has fulfilled for me.”

But the devil always attacks this. “You don’t deserve God’s love.”
“Look at your filthy garments. How can God love you?”

And this leaves us wide open to the vain philosophies of men which seek to cheat us of the reward of Christ.

Paul writes, “You are complete in Him”.

First, we are complete. We are filled. Every spiritual blessing is ours – forgiveness of sin, everlasting righteousness and life. We are fully accepted in the beloved, because we are righteous before God by faith. It would be unjust for God to punish our sins for he already punished them in Christ and we are in Him by faith. The Holy Spirit is ours, creating in us clean hearts and working in us, conforming us to the image of Christ. 

But the devil is always there to point out how far short we come, trying to point us either to despair, or to works-righteousness, desperately trying to match a standard that we cannot possibly achieve.

And, second, we are complete in Him. It is true that we cannot ever fulfill the law, nor can we make a sacrifice for sin. Christ did it all in our place.

We either fall too far one way, denying that Christ did it all; or fall too far the other way, saying that it hasn’t been done.
The scripture teaches that we are righteous before God by faith.
It also teaches that this righteousness is not earned or accomplished by us, but by Christ.

To deny either one of those is to deny the heart of the gospel.

Look, then, at the previously mentioned blog:
Q11. How good a husband is my husband to me?
A11. Much better than I deserve, and therefore I will thank God for him every day.

Dear daughter of God, if you are in Christ by faith, then you no longer deserve eternal wrath and punishment, but you are deserving of eternal life and every spiritual blessing, as if you had never committed nor had any sin.
Did you earn this? Did you actually do any of these good works? Of course not. Personally, you have rebelled and sinned grievously against God.

But to continue to believe that you do not deserve eternal life is to deny the Lord who bought you. Jesus paid it all. It is all done. His righteousness is given to you and your sins were nailed to the cross.

As a child of God, you are an heir to the promise of God.

Don’t forget that your husband is commanded to deal with you as an heir to eternal life (1 Peter 3:7); no longer a sinner, but as a co-heir of eternal life.

Don’t ever let the devil tell you that you don’t deserve it. The Holy Spirit points out sins to us to draw us closer to God in repentance and faith, comforting us by the gospel; the devil and his children point out sins to leave us in despair – hopeless, and doubting the goodness of God and the salvation that He has freely given to us.

Don’t let the devil do to you what he tried to do to Joshua (Read Zechariah 3). Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

6 As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him:
7 Rooted and built up in him, and stablished in the faith, as ye have been taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving.(Col. 2:6-7)

For you husbands, please hear the words of Peter, who commands you to deal with your wives as co-heirs of eternal life. Because she is in Christ, because an inheritance awaits her, purchased by Jesus Himself, everything that you do with her is far less than she deserves, not far more.

No matter how well you treat her, her reward will only come (by grace, never by merit) when Jesus comes again. Treat her as a daughter of God.

Next time you belittle her, strike her, cut her down, insult her, or even cause her tears, remind yourself how Jesus promises to deal with those who mistreat his children.

If you say, “It’s better than she deserves”, you have denied Christ, denied the gospel, and harmed one of God’s children.

I would seriously and urgently plead with you to repent before Jesus comes again to bring vindication and justice to His people.

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July 10, 2014 · 6:01 pm

God’s grace an excuse for cruelty??

A pastor’s primary function is to preach and teach God’s word to the sheep that Jesus has placed in his care.  In order to do this effectively, he must be a lover of language. He must become a master of communication.  Not, indeed, the language of the world wielded by the manipulators of rhetoric, but as a steward of the treasure that God has placed in his care.  The ungodly man uses language to manipulate people, to get people to act in a way that he wishes them to act.  As Christians, however, we must learn how to use language in order to convey truth clearly and effectively.  But unfortunately, pastors frequently become manipulators of people instead of preachers of truth.

To be a God-pleasing preacher of truth, a pastor must understand two things:

First, he must understand what God teaches in His word.  Good seminaries drill this into the heads of their students with original language classes, systematics, apologetics, Old and New Testament survey classes, exegesis classes, and other offerings.

But unfortunately this is not enough.  A man may be an expert in the meaning and theology of the scripture and be completely unable to communicate that effectively, for he has not yet understood the English language.  Through poor choices of words, truth is skewered and equity is fallen in the streets.

So the second thing that a pastor must understand in order to communicate God’s word effectively is how the English language works and how to put the truth of God’s word into accurate language to be understood clearly by his audience.  The goal in communicating truth is to speak in such a way that the ideas in the speaker’s head are transferred to the mind of the hearer with as little loss as possible.  We may think that we are communicating one thing, when in fact our hearers hear something else entirely.  If pastors do not understand this, their work will be ineffective at best and outright harmful to the soul at worst.

A word in any language may have different nuances or even different meanings altogether depending upon the context of the word.

Take the word “love”.  I saw a car with two bumper stickers.  One said, “I love my Golden Retriever.” The other said, “I love Jesus.”    Same car; same bumper.

What the owner of the car was attempting to communicate was lost to me.  Two abstract thoughts, one referring to the affection that a man feels for his dog, and the other a religious affection for our Lord and Savior, were both denotated by the same word: “love”.  Two thoughts.  One word.

At the very least, I would hope that in the mind of the car owner these were two separate ideas.  But perhaps he meant that his love for his dog was exactly identical (univocal) to the love that he has for Jesus, in which case we would have to charge him with polytheism, in the same way that you would charge a man with bestiality for loving his dog and loving his wife univocally.

For those who may think that I am splitting hairs, or using ridiculous examples, I would like to remind you that we are currently inundated with predators and pedophiles who use the same techniques to cover their horrendous and vile actions.  I take great offence at the North American Man/Boy Love
Association for using the word “love” to describe their filthy lusts, hoping that our refusal to analyze language will give them a pass.  But do not be deceived.  What they mean by “love” and what I mean by “love” are two different things entirely.

A recent blog, A Christian Wife’s Marriage Catechism  commits a similar error, with similar deadly consequences for the truth of the Gospel.

You can find some excellent refutations here.

I have much to say.  But I will limit my comments to only one question of this catechism:

Q11.    How good a husband is my husband to me?

A11.    Much better than I deserve, and therefore I will thank God for him every day.

Here the writer makes a deadly error.  Here we see the error of using a word with several different meanings as if it only had one meaning.  Let me illustrate:

What he is saying in effect is this:  Because I deserve eternal punishment in hell for my sins, it follows that I deserve to take whatever injustice and abuse that my husband wishes to dish out to me.

But does this follow, or is it possible that the English word “deserve” has different meanings depending on the context?

In Shakespeare’s great tragedy Hamlet, Hamlet the Prince asks Polonius to take the newly arrived actors to their accommodations and make sure they had what they needed for their comfort.  Polonius replied, “I will treat them according to their desert.”

Hamlet replied, “God’s bodkin, man, much better!  Treat every man according to his desert and who shall ‘scape whipping?”

Hamlet has made the same error.  Polonius was merely speaking of giving them the accommodations and amenities that their station and their labors warranted.  Hamlet then replied, swearing by the bodkin, or dagger, of God, referring to their standing as sinners before the Throne of God. But the desert of the actors at the hands of Polonius and the desert of the actors at the hands of God are two different things!

Are we to believe that since no one has ever earned any favor from God whatsoever, but has received every good thing by grace alone that it would therefore follow that my boss can withhold my paycheck from me, since I deserve far worse?

If the blogger in question would be consistent with his univocal use of the word “deserve”, we would expect the following exchange:  “My employer has robbed me of my wages.  What should I do?”

Answer, “Rejoice that you have received far more than you deserve and continue to work for him with a meek and quiet spirit.  Don’t make a fuss.”

Take it one step further:  “My family was slaughtered by a wicked man.”

Answer: “It was better than they deserved.  Let it go, and don’t make a fuss.  No need to involve the police.”

It is indeed true that God’s mercy can never be earned – or deserved.  We increase our guilt daily before God.  We are fallen sinners.  Unless we are born again, we deserve nothing but eternal wrath and damnation.  This is taught clearly throughout Scripture.

(Eph 2:8-9 KJV)  8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:  9 Not of works, lest any man should boast.

But this is speaking of our standing before the Judgment Throne of God.  It does not follow that we therefore deserve to be treated with cruelty, hatred and dishonor by wicked men.

If the grace of God can be used to justify injustice and cruelty, then words no longer have any meaning.

From the hand of God we always and continually receive far more that we can ever merit or “deserve”, for even the best works in this life are all polluted by sin.

Does it then follow that we do not deserve kindness, love, respect and honor from our fellow man?  Not according to the Bible.

Consider the following passage:

(Rom 13:7-8 KJV)  7 Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour to whom honour. 8 Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.

God teaches here that there are those who deserve our taxes, our honor, and our tribute.  But then in verse 8, he carries the argument further:  We owe all men love.  Not the love of the world, but love defined by the law of God.

For a husband, we owe our wives the same love with which Christ loved his church.  Does she earn it?  Of course not.  But does she deserve it?  She certainly does.

In another place, Paul teaches that husbands and wives are both owed benevolence – they deserve it because they are husband and wife:

1 Corinthians 7:3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

If it were not possible to treat our wives worse than they deserve, as this blog implies, then it would not be possible to defraud your wife, and Paul’s command would make no sense (1 Cor. 7:5).  Paul’s argument depends upon the Biblical truth that a husband owes his wife benevolence (favor, good-will, sexual intimacy).  To put it passively, she deserves it because she is his wife.  To withhold those things is to defraud her – or to treat her less than she deserves – directly contrary to the statement made by this blogger.

To the beloved daughters of God, do not allow your husband to treat you less than you deserve as his wife.  On the same token, do not treat your husband less than he deserves as your husband.  God requires equity in our dealings, not fuzzy appeals to misunderstood grace.

Equity means that we treat others fairly, or as they deserve.  Fulfill those obligations and remember that you have a right to expect the same in all of your relationships.  This is what a covenant of marriage is.  We are in a covenant and there are covenant obligations.  A husband owes his wife the fulfillment of his vows, and she deserves that fulfillment, because she is his wife.

If I make a contract, the other party deserves for me to fulfill my end.  Why is marriage any different?

Let us exegete scripture correctly, lest we become prey for the devil, and expose ourselves to the abuses of wicked men.

To affirm the covenant of marriage is to affirm the obligations of that covenant.  The husband deserves for the wife to fulfill her vow, and the wife deserves for the husband to fulfill his vow.  Neither party deserves to be treated with abuse, cruelty, violence and hatred.

The Bible also teaches that a husband or a wife can behave in such a monstrous way that they ultimately forfeit the benefits of this covenant, but that is another post for another time.

I have much more to say, but I have wearied the reader enough for the day.

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July 10, 2014 · 1:26 am

Sorry for the delay

In the life of a pastor, sometimes you just don’t have time to write as much as you would like.
It was my intention to keep this blog going, be interesting and hopefully edifying.
It is still my intention.
I hope you will bear with me.
I so greatly appreciate all of your support and I promise that I have not forgotten.
But there is family to care for, sheep to tend, sermons to prepare, students to encourage and stimulate – and sometimes what you want to do has to take a back seat to the work that our Lord calls us to do.
I have something rattling around my now fifty year old skull that I shall attempt to put on pixels tomorrow.
Of course, we know how that goes at times, do we not?

Sam

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June 27, 2014 · 9:01 pm

In the presence of God

Psalm 134

1. Behold, bless ye the LORD, all ye servants of the LORD, which by night stand in the house of the LORD.
2. Lift up your hands in the sanctuary, and bless the LORD.
3. The LORD that made heaven and earth bless thee out of Zion.

This is just a short Psalm, that may seem a bit strange to us living in America in the 21st century.  But look at it closely.

We know that David organized the Levites to do the work of the Temple.  The Temple in Jerusalem was where God’s presence was.  It was where God met with His people, accepted their sacrifices and worship, and was with them.

These Levites had a lot of mundane work to do.  They would sweep the floors, take out the garbage, count the money, take stock of the inventory for the next day, and busy themselves in the business of the temple.

Some of the Levites were the night watchmen.  It was their job to guard the temple.  Anyone who has ever worked the night-shift knows how long the hours seem as they go by – especially if your only job is to stay awake and watch.

David is reminding them that their jobs are not what they seem.  They are highly favored ones, greatly privileged to stand in the presence of God, to serve Him in His Holy Temple!  Their work could very easily become mundane, repetitive and seemingly useless.  If they are like a lot of us, they would wonder if it even made any difference.

But they were working in the presence of God; their work could never be useless and mundane, for they served the glorious and almighty Maker of heaven and earth who dwelt with His people.  They served the same Triune God that led them with the glorious pillar of fire and pillar of cloud, who drowned Pharaoh in the Red Sea, while Israel walked on dry ground.  To be God’s people truly means something magnificent.  When God is in our midst, who is there to fear?

When Jesus came into the world, the Temple became obsolete.  When He died and put away our sins forever the veil that separated the Holy of Holies from the rest of the Temple was torn from top to bottom.  The presence of God would now no longer be in a Temple made with hands, but He would pour out His Holy Spirit on the church and dwell with them forever, living in their hearts by faith.

When Jesus ascended into heaven, the Holy Spirit came upon the church in the upper room in Jerusalem.  That which the Temple foreshadowed was now a reality.  God is truly in our midst.  He is our God and we are His people.

So what does this have to do with this Psalm?  We may not be ancient Levites.  We may not be night watchmen in the Temple in Jerusalem.  But we are all something far, far greater:  We are a holy nation, a royal priesthood (1 Peter 2:9).  We are the Church of the Living God! Everything that we do is in the presence of almighty God, who loves us and sent us His only begotten Son, who died for us, rose from the dead and ascended into heaven so that He might give to us the Holy Spirit.  We truly work, eat, sleep, play, live and love in the presence of our Eternal and Almighty Father!  What a thought!

Which means that our work also can never be mundane.  Which means that we will never be alone.  Which means that he guards, defends,  and preserves us forever, even in this vale of tears, until finally complete victory is ours.

Whether we are changing diapers, cleaning toilets, counting things, stacking things, filing briefs, doing dishes, mopping floors, fixing pipes or building cabinets – we do it in the presence of God, as His servants, under His eye, under His protection, under His fatherly hand. We are bringing order and exercising dominion in a fallen world.  It isn’t fixing pipes; it is declaring war on Satan himself!  The author of confusion and chaos and ruin trembles every time a mother changes the diaper of her little one in service to her Lord.  Remember that Jehosheba “only” loved, protected and raised a baby while the wicked queen Athaliah was destroying all of the seed of David (2 Kings 11).  But through this service, God brought our Redeemer into the world.  It looked like diapers, baby food and nap time for Jehosheba; but it was the salvation of the world in God’s economy.

The problem is that often times we want to serve ourselves and our pleasures, but we will never find our purpose there, for we were created for something greater than serving our bellies.

We want all of the answers and we want them now.  But God says, “Wait.  Trust. Obey.”

Or we try to protect ourselves.  We distrust God’s hand. We still think that God only helps those that help themselves forgetting that our God helps the helpless, the fatherless, the orphans, the sick, wounded, outcast, weak, blind, lame and halt.

He gathers up the outcasts of Israel and the outcasts of the Gentiles and brings them into His kingdom, to praise and glorify Him forever in His presence.

And every task that we do, we are to do it with our might, because it isn’t useless.  It isn’t mundane. It isn’t ordinary.

It is to the Lord, and we have no idea what He will do with it – but we know that it will be magnificent!  We don’t need God to hurry; we do need to learn patience and trust.

We often sow our seeds with tears, but the harvest is plentiful and unimaginable.  Not one thing that we have committed to His hand will be wasted or lost, for His ways are not our ways.

Walk by faith, then; not by sight.  Obey Him; work in His presence; bless the Lord, lifting up holy hands, for God now accepts your works.

May the Lord bless thee out of Zion.

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June 19, 2014 · 4:59 pm

King David and Bill Gothard

Lately there has been a lot of chatter on the blogosphere.  Through the efforts of some in the church, abusers, child molesters, predators and other wolves have finally begun to be exposed for what they are.  I thank God daily that my prayers are being answered and the wolves among us are finally being exposed for who they are.

However, there is also a dark note to all of this.  With all of the exposure, the old way of viewing things still rears its head.  I have lost track of how many times we have been chided and admonished to “remember mercy”, as if it operates differently than justice.  An abuser cries the right tears, says the right things, and blame is then placed on the victim and the church for not forgiving.  “David sinned”, is the repeating cry.

Bare sentiment gives no comfort. Lack of sentiment is even worse.  How hard must a heart be to hear the stories of victimization, terror and abuse of God’s little ones without weeping with those that weep?

But true comfort must come from the Holy Scriptures alone.  Is it true that we are to forgive everyone for every sin because God forgave David?  Is it true that David’s sin and David’s repentance are guides to follow to allow an abusive man access to our children?  Or could it be that David’s sin is still being used as an excuse for the enemies of God to blaspheme?

I would encourage everyone who is reading this to open their Bibles to 2 Samuel 11 and 12.  Please read these accounts before continuing.  I will wait…

Finished?  OK.  Notice several things.  I will in no way say or imply that David’s sin was minor.  Both the adultery and the murder of Uriah showed the ugliness and entitlement of David’s heart.  “I am king.  I deserve what I want to have.  I could just take it.  Being king is stressful.  Besides, Bathsheba shouldn’t have been bathing on the roof in the first place.  Really, it is her fault.”

It was ugly to the very core.  Premeditated adultery, planned and executed outright murder, cover-up, deceit and entitlement.  Please keep this in mind.

If your response is that since David sinned and was forgiven, then we need to go easier on adulterers. abusers, murderers and molesters, then you have missed the whole point, and do not at all understand the grace of God.

If you read Chapter 12, you will begin to understand justice and mercy meeting together without doing violence to either one.

Nathan confronted David with a parable (12:1-4).  The actions of the rich man of the parable were reprehensible.  And David sentenced the man to death and ordered restitution.  Then Nathan exposed David as the one that was under the death penalty, which he commanded by his own lips.

Then, verses 8-12, Nathan continues stripping away every excuse from David, exposing the wickedness of his heart, and pronouncing the dreadful justice of God.

He did not say, “You made some bad choices, but God still loves you”.

He did not say, “I think that God still desires to use you for His work in His kingdom”

He did not say, “You have acted in an inappropriate manner, and we are suspending you until you get therapy”.

He said, “You are the man.”  After listing all of God’s goodness to David, he said, “Why have you despised the commandment of God, to do evil in His sight?”

All of those who compare wicked church leaders to David seem to miss this point.

We have the hindsight of history.  We know that David repented and that God was merciful to him, and that he was the elect of God.  But this is important: at the point that Nathan confronted David, neither Nathan NOR David knew any such thing.  What David knew was God’s impending judgment, that he was rightly under the death penalty – both civilly and eternally.  David only knew that his own wicked heart – without excuse, without double talk, without blameshifting – put him directly under the judgment of God, and that he was hanging over the chasm of hell by his fingertips, without hope, without excuse, without appeal.  It was finished, and David was finished as king and as a man.

And then, apart from any entitlement, apart from any demands, God’s incredible grace, wonderful mercy, comes through.  “The Lord has put away your sins.  Thou shalt not die.”

Wow.  There were millions of others who committed murder and adultery and justly died.  Paul refers to them in Ephesians 5:5-6.  David knew that as well.  At the point of Nathan’s confrontation, David had NO REASON whatsoever to believe that he was even a Christian.  He was a filthy sinner, defiled and alienated from God.

This is what made the grace of God even more astounding.  David wasn’t entitled to it and he knew it.

He didn’t simply quote verses on forgiveness, nor did he cite his fathers as examples of God’s grace and demand the same as his due.

He fell before the awful judgment throne of God, recognized that he was justly a dead man.  And then he received mercy.

He also understood that his whole life from that moment on was not his, and God could do with him whatever God pleased.

So David never railed against God when God removed his kingdom.

David accepted Shimei’s cursing, as perhaps coming from God.

David understood that he was crucified with Christ, so that he might live in him.

Compare that with the current statement from the Board of Directors of the Institute of Basic Life Principles.

“Mr. Gothard has acted in an inappropriate manner.”

The board realizes the “seriousness of his lack of discretion.”

“He failed to follow Christ’s example to be blameless and above reproach.”  This one really gets me.  Look behind the fancy words.  The really problem, according to IBLP, is that people were talking and blaming Mr. Gothard.  He didn’t do anything.  but his inappropriateness caused others to talk.  Blame the victim.  If they just kept quiet, none of this would have happened.

They also badly interpreted and spun 1 Thessalonians 5:22.  They wrote, “As a Christian leader, he is to avoid the appearance of evil.”  In other words, Mr. Gothard didn’t do anything evil, but he is liable for appearing to do something evil.  This, however, is not at all the meaning of 1 Thessalonians.  (I might remind them that as church leaders, they are also responsible to rightly divide the word of God, but they haven’t done that for years).  Paul is using the analogy of a stage play.  The “appearance” that he is referring to is like the mask that evil puts on when he makes an appearance on the stage of our life.  Paul is saying, “No matter what mask evil wears, shun it completely.”

He does not at all mean that anything that anyone could possibly interpret as wrong should be avoided.  Christians are always falsely accused, and always will be.

However, to apply this correctly, we would have to say this.  Mr. Gothard has repeatedly and continuously preyed upon women and children.  He has set himself up as a leader apart from the church, with no accountability (as is evident from this horrible publicity spin from the board of directors), and has used that position to gratify his own lusts for preeminence, control and power.  These are not shortcomings, they are marks of a wolf.  There is no biblical reason whatsoever to conclude that he has repented of any of these actions – it is simply more of the same, and he still does not acknowledge that he is what God says he is.  That. as it did with David, always comes first.  There can be no offer of grace without first a stripping away of every pretense and excuse, which also is the work of God.  As long as Mr. Gothard is still spinning, he is not repentant, but what the Bible calls, “Stiff-necked and hard of heart, always resisting the Spirit.”

It is true, as I continually say, that God can call anyone to repentance and faith.  Every believer is a testimony of life from the dead.  I also am not saying these things out of hatred of Mr. Gothard. I don’t know the man, although I have first-hand experience of the damage that his false teaching has caused over the years.

I am saying this actually out of a sincere desire to see Mr. Gothard and his board truly get right with God.  There is not one instance of true faith in the bible that came without first a full understanding and horrible dread of the awful judgment of God.

Only when you realize that you are a sinner in the hands of an angry God can you truly understand the beauty and comfort of the Gospel.  But when you understand that, as David did, there is no more room left for presumption and demands.

As it has been said, “If you wish to follow David in his sins, follow him also in his repentance.”

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June 5, 2014 · 6:02 pm

Things that should be obvious to every Christian

Jesus expects and commands us to distinguish between wolves and sheep (Matt.7:15-16)

A wolf is known by his appetites.  A wolf wants to use the sheep to fill his own lusts, and does not care about whether this hurts the sheep or not.

A man who rapes children is a wolf, not a misguided sheep.

A man who molests children is a wolf, not a misguided sheep.

A man who beats his wife, cheats on his wife, demands complete and absolute obedience from his wife, and believes that he is the voice of God in his home, is using his wife to fill his own lusts for self-importance, power, and self-worship to the hurt of his wife.  He is a wolf, not a sheep.

A man who has his children in absolute terror, who holds or gives his favor to his family based upon his whims and his lusts for power and control is using his God-given authority to destroy and devour the sheep.  He is a wolf, not a sheep.

And here is a biggie.  Matthew 18:15-18 are the instructions of our Lord concerning brothers who have sinned against each other. They are not intended as instructions on how to deal with wolves.  Wolves must be cast out and left in the hands of God.  Wolves have no problem pretending to be sheep – even to the point of tears and all of the right words.  But Jesus said that you will know them by the fruits, not by their tears and empty words.

Before you apply Matthew 18, you must ask yourself if you are dealing with a wolf or with a sheep.  Jesus commanded us to tell the difference.  You will know them by their fruits (see above). 

It is true that everyone struggles with sin.  Brothers and sisters in the faith hurt one another, for they still fight against the Old Man. But there is a difference between struggling with anger and raping a child.

There is a difference between struggling with gossip and molesting a child.

There is a difference between angry words spoken in haste and deliberate and careful abuse of a wife.

There is a difference between struggles against lust and planning and executing the plan to carry on an adulterous affair against your wife.  A wolf uses his mistress, his wife and his children to satisfy his own lusts, and he does not care who he hurts in the process.  He is a wolf, not a sheep.

I do not say this to minimize anger, gossip or even lust.  I say this to clarify the behavior of a wolf and the behavior of a sheep who is going astray.

Sheep going astray may fall into grievous sin.  A wolf is something else entirely.

This should be obvious, but it apparently is not.  So here is a guide.  Sheep sometimes go astray.  That’s what sheep do.  Apply Matthew 18, Gal. 6:1, and other passages that teach how to deal with brothers who are entangled in sin.

A wolf, on the other hand, views people only as objects to be used and discarded to fill the lusts of the wolf.  Wolves devour and destroy.

Jesus commanded us to tell the difference, if we have the courage.

(Can a wolf be born again and given a new nature – of course.  God can do as he pleases.  But we will never bring that about by pretending that the wolf is a sheep.  God will not be mocked.)

Hope this helps.  If you refuse to tell the difference between a wolf and a sheep, please never hold church office, for you are putting the sheep in danger, and God will hold you accountable.

 

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May 30, 2014 · 12:46 am

Apricot Jam and Hope

We are a proud bunch.  I remember my youth.  I thought that any problem that came along I could fix.  I was pretty clever, healthy, able to hold down a job.  I was catechized when I was young so I knew my theology.  I figured that I had the answers to whatever life threw my way.

But I didn’t understand this: to believe the gospel is to declare war on the devil.  And the devil doesn’t let go of his kingdom easily.

I always knew that there was a devil and that he was our enemy.  Our catechism said so.  But he seemed far away and not really relevant to anything in my life.  I guess that I had the same view of God.  When it came right down to it, I got in trouble because I was foolish and if I would just be wiser, I could get myself out of trouble.

This is our human condition, isn’t it?  The Bible calls it pride.  We’ll take care of ourselves, thank you.  We can protect our families. We can save people if we just explain it right.  Just a little more love, a little more forgiveness, a little more hard work and everything will be fine.

But what do you do when the curtain of your life is pulled back a little and you see just how weak, helpless, poor, powerless and  blind you really are?

What do you do when God brings about something in your life that you can’t do anything about?  What do you do when God allows Satan to attack your family, your health – or even your faith?

You can gnash your teeth against God; you can shake your fist at the heavens; you can rage against the dying of the light.  Or you can mourn, cast your cares upon God and wait.

Jesus said, “Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”

We tend to think the opposite.  A happy man is one who has a full pantry, a full bank account, health and youth, and an untroubled life.  Isn’t that the American Dream.  Isn’t that what we pay our politician to achieve for us?

But life doesn’t work that way.  God has something far, far greater for us than the baubles of this world.  He has reserved for us something far greater than wealth and health and friends and security on this earth.  What each of us really long for is to be in His glorious presence forever.  That is how we were made, and we will never have purpose and meaning in our lives until we are with our Maker, reconciled at last, standing as priests before Him.  And God would teach us to lift our eyes out of this earthly trough and learn to long for heaven.

This is why Jesus came in to the world, to take away our sin and reconcile us to God.  He came so that our eyes might be opened and our tongues loosened to worship someone far greater than our bellies and our health and our own desires.  And He will indeed bring us finally into the presence of the living God. But first our pride has to go.  What stands in our way so often is that we still like to think that we’ve got this life thing under control.  But as long as we think we are in control, we will never fully learn to trust God and lean on Him for all good things.

And the way we learn to put our trust in Him completely is when everything else is taken away.  First, we take up our cross.  We lose our lives so that we might find them.

What do you do when you think you have this life thing under control and then the rug is pulled away?  What do you do when wicked men have he upper hand?  When the righteous are ridiculed and persecuted and the wicked man is exalted?  What do you do when Satan runs amok and is too powerful? When he attacks your children through abuse?  When God takes away the health of a loved one?  When everywhere you turn there is no help, no earthly hope, no justice, no light?

All we can do is mourn and wait.  Sure, there are things that you are commanded by God to do.  Confront sin.  Alert authority when crimes are committed. Rely on the assistance of the church officers.  We can obey, but often we can’t fix anything.  That’s because it is only God who can fix what is wrong in this world.  We can’t fix it.  I can’t fix the world.

I can’t find the words to say in the face of tremendous evil.  I can’t wish you healthy.  I can’t make your pain go away.  I can’t wipe away your tears.
How I wish I could!  How I weep with you.

I mourn for the millions of babies slaughtered at the altar of Molech.  I weep for Meriam, about to be lashed and executed for her faith.  I weep for the hundreds of girls stolen and sold as wives to children of the devil.  I mourn for those who are persecuted and ridiculed for their faith.
I mourn for those who are chronically ill that cannot find help with the doctors.  I mourn for all those in constant pain.  I mourn for those who have been slandered and abandoned by their friends and families.

I mourn for our little ones.  I mourn for the hundreds of thousands of children in our country sexually assaulted each year – with no help, no way out.  Often, not even the church believes them, and when they do they don’t want to deal with it.  I can mourn for them.  I can help wherever I can. I can preach and teach against it. I can give a glass of cold water.  I can make meals.  I can offer a shoulder, and I do it gladly and without reproach.

But I can’t wipe away the tears.  I can’t stop the evil.  Only Jesus can comfort the mourners.  Only God can wipe away the tears.  Only God can bring justice and salvation.

So I’m making apricot jam.  I can’t find the right words.  My heart sinks within me.  But in this vale of tears, God brings what first seem like very small blessings – but they are tokens of Eden, foretastes of heaven.

The apricot, for example.  Such delight, such charm.  An apricot in season off of a northern California tree is something to be marveled at.  That we can preserve them in little jars to have all year is a wonderful thing.

God could have justly cast us all into hell.  God could have begrudgingly given us black bread and water and it would have been far more than we deserve.  But he gave us the apricot!  A token of hope.
This world is not all that there is.  We were created for something far greater and God has promised us that he will wipe away all tears and comfort all who mourn.
And as a token, he gave us the apricot.  Of course, not just an apricot, but all good things – wine to gladden the heart, oil to make the face shine, as the Psalmist says.

Life is very often not found where we look for it.  We look for something smashing; we look for those special moments that come along sporadically.  We look for that which is grand, exciting, magnificent.

And we miss apricot season.  God’s goodness abounds to us and we look the other way and say, “What else?”

The devil has declared war on God’s people.  He seeks to destroy and devour.  You will suffer tremendous pain and heartache on this earth, for Jesus promised that every Christian will have trials and persecution.

But He has also promised to comfort those who mourn.  To wipe away the tears.  He points us to something far greater than this valley of the shadow of death.

So I got up, closed my book, lifted my eyes to heaven in thanksgiving.

And now I’m making apricot jam.  God is so good to us.  Wait for Him.  He is coming again and all this will pass away.

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May 15, 2014 · 6:32 pm

What the husband of a chronically ill wife wants her to know.

My dear wife recently sent me a list of three things that a chronically ill person wants her loved ones to know.  You can access that article here. 

It is very well done, and puts to words all that you are feeling.

My darling, I know.  I’ve heard you.  I understand.

I also want you to know that there are three things that a husband of a chronically ill wife wants her to know:

  1. I want you to know that your value to me is not connected to how many chores you can accomplish.

I don’t love you because you do stuff.  I don’t value you because of your efficient shopping and laundry skills.  I know you have them; I brag about them.  I know that you long with your whole heart to be healthy enough to do chores; and I admire you for that.

But I don’t love you for what you do; I love you because of who you are.  I love you because God has joined us together and my life would be black and white without you in it.  I love you because you are a daughter of God and with your whole life you point me to the beautiful Savior.  I love you because we have something quite special: in our union we picture Christ and the church!  In our relationship, we are something far greater than simply two people who share chores.  We are one flesh, linked together by covenant as Christ is forever united to His church.

I love you because you are my half of the orange; my flesh and my bones.  When you hurt, I hurt.  When you grieve, I grieve with you.

When all you can do is reach out when we are sitting together and touch my hand, the universe moves.  It may seem small, but worlds pass between us.  You aren’t a maid, a laundress, a schoolmarm – you are my wife.  Your touch moves my world.

  1. I want you to know that life consists of more than activity.

I don’t dream of the next party, the next activity, the next thing.  All of that is nothing if you are not there.  My life is already full of too much activity.  What I dream of is simply sitting with you; talking, watching, praying, thinking.

My life is not full because I do a lot of stuff.  I know that you apologize for not being able to be there, but I’d rather bring a meal to you in your chair than dine without you in the banquet hall of the great ones.

I want you to know that when you are here, I’m not missing out on anything.  You may feel useless and a drain on us all, but you have no idea how much we all lean on you.  You are our stability, our home, our comfort.

  1. I want you to know that I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I say this – even though I grieve with you; even though I pray and long for your health and strength; even though I do get weary and overwhelmed sometimes.  But what it all comes down to is this: When I vowed “in sickness and in health” I wasn’t just saying words.  I know that health and sickness only come from the hand of God, and that He is good.

I know that all things must work together for our salvation.  I know that He has linked my life to yours, and we are in this together.  We will grieve together; we will pray together.  And if you NEVER recover strength, we will lean on our God together.  And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

It’s you and me.  I’m with you.  That’s where I belong.  Let’s do this thing together.

“Set me as a seal upon your heart, As a seal upon your arm; For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; Its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame. Many waters cannot quench love, Nor can the floods drown it. If a man would give for love All the wealth of his house, It would be utterly despised” (Sol 8:6-7 NKJ).

 

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